A paid one-on-one mentor helps you choose a few goals, break them into small weekly steps and follow through. Each week you meet, look at what happened, work through what got in the way and set the next steps. Between sessions the mentor checks in by text or phone. A mentor is an experienced person in your corner, not a therapist, tutor or admissions counselor.
The short version: goals, steps, follow-through
Most people already know roughly what they want to change. What is missing is a plan small enough to start and someone who notices whether it happened. A mentor’s job comes down to three things:
- Clarity. Turning “get my life together” into two or three goals you can actually measure.
- Steps. Breaking each goal into this week’s actions, sized so they get done.
- Follow-through. Checking in, adjusting when something does not work and keeping momentum when motivation dips.
What a typical week looks like
- The session. You meet for 30 or 60 minutes, by video or in person. You review last week, pick the next steps and put them on a calendar.
- Midweek check-ins. A text or a quick call: did the application go out, did the new wake time hold, what is getting in the way?
- Small course corrections. If a plan is not working by Wednesday, you change it then rather than waiting a week.
- Progress updates. With the client’s permission, the mentor shares how things are going with parents or family.
- The next session. You start with what actually happened, not what was supposed to happen, and build from there.
Some people meet weekly; others meet several times a week while they rebuild a routine. See how often to meet with a mentor and, for what the very first meeting covers, your first mentoring session.
What happens inside a session
- Reviewing wins and misses honestly, without lectures.
- Solving one real obstacle, such as a class that is slipping, a budget that keeps breaking or a job search that stalled.
- Practicing a skill: drafting an email to a professor, planning a week, preparing for an interview conversation or a hard talk with a roommate.
- Setting next steps with dates, and deciding when the mentor will check in.
- Looking ahead a few weeks so deadlines do not arrive as surprises.
What a mentor is not
Being clear about this protects everyone. A mentor:
- Is not a therapist. Mentors do not diagnose or treat mental health conditions. See mentor vs coach vs therapist.
- Is not a tutor. A mentor helps with study plans and habits, not teaching course content. See mentor vs tutor.
- Is not an admissions counselor or educational consultant. Mentors keep college tasks on schedule but do not advise on admissions strategy.
- Is not a replacement for parents. A mentor works alongside the family, not instead of it.
If anxiety, depression, substance use or another mental health concern is part of the picture, a licensed professional is the right step. With permission, a mentor can coordinate with professionals already involved; see therapy and mentoring together. In a crisis, call or text 988.
Examples of goals by audience
High school students
Turning in work on time, building a weekly study routine, getting a first job or preparing for life after high school. A parent or guardian is always involved. See mentoring for high school students.
College students and the first year
Going to class, managing a schedule with no one checking, using campus resources and recovering from a rough semester. See mentoring for college students and college transition mentoring.
Young adults and gap years
Getting a job, building a daily routine, budgeting, moving out or making a gap year count. See young adult mentoring.
Professionals
Staying on top of a demanding role, planning a career change or building habits around health and fitness and money. Mentoring can also support people in recovery, as one of several specialties.
Where Blackburn fits
Every client at Blackburn gets one dedicated mentor. Sessions are 30 or 60 minutes, weekly or several times a week, with text and phone contact between sessions, by video anywhere in the United States or in person in Los Angeles. Read how mentoring works and how we match each client with a mentor. Not sure it fits? Try the mentor fit quiz or take the five-minute assessment at get started.
Related
- Benefits of mentoring
- Accountability coaching
- How to choose a mentoring program
- How much does a mentor cost?
- Mentoring programs for teens, explained
Common questions
How is a mentor different from a coach?
The roles overlap. In our work, mentoring means a steady one-on-one relationship built on weekly goals and follow-through, with contact between sessions.
Does a mentor give advice or let you decide?
Both, at different times. A mentor shares experience and options, but the goals and choices stay yours.
What does a mentor do between sessions?
Checks in by text or phone, reminds you of the steps you set and helps you adjust if something is not working.
Can a mentor help a teenager who does not want help?
Sometimes. A good match and goals the teen actually cares about make a big difference, and parents stay involved throughout.
Get started
Wondering what weekly mentoring would look like for you or your family? Call (888) 305 5422, email contact@blackburnmentoring.com or start with a short assessment. A member of our team reviews every assessment personally and sets up a free intro call.